The Official Blog of La Mott Jackson

“H1N1″ replaces “Swine Flu” because that term offended pig farmers. Pigs would have filed the complaint themselves but they were too busy getting hacked to death by none other than guess who?

L

Roman Polanski is an artist, and he’ll feel @ home in the company of other artist while locked up. Abstract art using a sex offender’s blood and fecal matter?, Genius!!

L

The New York Anime Festival is this weekend. I should show up dressed as a Japanese schoolgirl. I Bet no one’s done that before, right?

L

“Jennifer’s Body” opens in 5th place. Apparently Megan’s fan base decided hitting peep booths and ruining socks made for a better weekend.
L

Ever see the time lapse video of a wolf rotting in the woods?, I just farted and it smelled like that I shit you not.

L

I’m Swayze, not dead but Audi, not the car but bouncing, not like a ball but…oh goodnight God dammit!.
L

…adding South Carolina Congressman Joe Wilson to my 2009 Shitlist…underlining…asterisk…hairy cock & balls next to it with stink lines. Done!.

L

Jon Gosselin loves his girlfriend more than his ex-wife Kate, so much so that he no longer misses quickies…like ever.

L

Ever receive a friend request on Facebook or Myspace and then say to yourself, “That’s not happening”?. I just did that.

L

Obama’s gonna give a speech at Walter Cronkite’s memorial. Maybe God would like to see the text to it beforehand in case anything in it sounds “disturbing”. Cause you never know; the speech might just violate Walt’s right to decompose & convert him in to a socialist.

L